Heavens to Betsy

Life in Hampton Beach is now in full-swing. The streets are bustling, the beach is packed, and the smell of sun-screen and salt water is a constant aroma. Oh, how I do love living at the beach. Every sunset and sunrise is different. Every day is different. You think the ocean is the same ever day—heavens to Betsy, no! At the front desk of the hotel every day I spend lots of time just staring at the water, watching the tides, the waves, clouds, and the COLORS! The water is always a different color—last night it was purple, and glassy—just the tiniest of waves right at the shoreline. Wow wow WOW! Phenomenal. God sure does know how to paint a pretty picture!

I am so settled in though now. Riding my bike all over the area, finding little back roads and trails! Like today, my friends Cyrus and Sarah were riding back from T.J. Maxx (oh yes, I am such an avid Maxxinista I WILL ride my bike 7 miles to get there!) when I just jumped off the road into the woods on this little trail. It was AWESOME! We ended up off-roadin’ it for about a half mile or so. It was AWESOME! Just this random trail beside some old train tracks going through the woods. I LOVE NATURE!

This week marks the half-way point of project. Can I just take a second to say—WOAH. And I think that these past couple days have been the absolute hardest of all the days I’ve been here. Especially yesterday.

Ok, so let me go back to last Monday night. We had our last weekly meeting with the staff and then people were just sitting in the living room talking with one another; hanging out like we do every night. My discipler, Abby, had texted me earlier in the day asking if she could hang out with me because she wanted to spend time with me before she left with the rest of the staff. I was excited to be spend some quality time with her. So we left the house and were just walking and talking about how we were going to bake cookies and whatnot. When I rounded the corner to go to her apartment, I saw the director of the project along with the operations director sitting in their car. I smiled and waved a goofy wave and commented to Abby that they must think I am nuts for walking around without shoes on (this is a regularly occurring habit I have picked up since being here at Hampton Beach). When we were walking past the car, the door opened, and the assistant director, Karen, looked blankly into my eyes and said, “GET IN”. I turned to look at Abby, who nodded for me to go ahead.

I was relieved to see a fellow student, Will also sitting in the back of the car. I would not be alone. After sitting for a few minutes, we saw another girl come around the corner, and then she too was shoved into the car. The three students, Will, Natalie and myself automatically began conversing with one another to stop the uncomfortable and somewhat intimidating silence. The staff just piped in every now and again.

Finally, we arrived at Chili’s. Now this was around 10:30 at night so it made it really strange and confusing. We all sat in a booth, staff on one side, students on the other. Natalie and I ran to the bathroom (we legitimately had to go—it wasn’t just one of those “girl’s have to have someone with them when they go to the bathroom” type of things. No way) and here we asked if we thought this meeting would have anything to do with the transfer of roles that would be happening the following Sunday. We both concluded that it must be.

Our deduction was, in fact, correct. The staff revealed to us that we were going to be the new directors of the project. For those of you who are not familiar with what this means, let me explain. I didn’t even know that this “transfer of responsibilities” happened until a couple weeks before I came on project. So basically, for the first half of the summer, the staff leads the students—in discipleship times, bible studies, outreach, various servant teams and with enforcing the rules and keeping everyone in check. Then, the staff appoints certain students to take over the roles that they have been in. So some students are bible study leaders, some lead the servant teams and so on and so forth. Karen, Tommy and Jeff were the three directors of project. They are on staff with Campus Crusade for Christ and so they were really in charge of the whole kit and caboodle. Their job was not easy. And now, three students are trying to fill some incredible large shoes. Will, Natalie and I were so very humbled when they told us of our positions. I at first questioned their decision, because I in now way feel like I can lead these girls and perform all the tasks that go along with being a director, but they assured me that lots and lots and lots of prayer went in to the decision. That they felt sure God wanted me in this spot.

Here are the positions: Will is Director of the whole entire project and took Jeff’s spot. Natalie is running the operations and I am the assistant project director (APD) and relieved Karen of her responsibilities.

So for the rest of last week leading up to Sunday afternoon when the various positions were revealed, Natalie, Will and I had to sneak out of the house and have secret meetings to plan what we had to do during our first week as directors. And I thought that was difficult.

Sunday the staff revealed who would be in various leadership positions. Right after they announced the three directors, they left to go on a retreat for a couple days. Will, Natalie and I then shared with our fellow students what our vision was for the summer. We thought it would be good to start off by washing the feet of the other students. To emphasize that we want to serve them as we lead them. That was a special time.

But with the staff gone for a couple days, it was tough. They came back, and that was good because they helped me realign my gaze to be set on Christ. Saying goodbye to them was real hard though. Sara has been my discipler for a couple weeks and was on staff at CNU, so our final farewell to one another without knowing exactly when we would see one another again was difficult. Then Abby, my discipler on project, was leaving as well. She lives in Portland, OR! Through these hard times of our “See you later’s”, I had to keep reminding myself of how thankful I am for these two women. Honestly, my life would not be anywhere near the same if these women of the Lord did not spend and invest so much time into my life. They dug deep in conversations with me to bring to light the nasty filthy state of my heart. I love these two ladies to heaven and back. Thank you from the depths of my being, Abby and Sara. Not sure if you will ever be able to realize how much you guys have meant to me.

Keeping up with the APD (Assistant Project Director) duties and working 40 hour weeks is tough. Oh boy. I know that the next 5 weeks of project will be impossible without Christ giving me strength each and every day. Be praying for his strength. I try so hard to sleep, but it just doesn’t happen.

I know that this is another long post that is poorly written but I just HAD to get something posted! I keep trying to update this every couple days, but it just doesn’t happen. I know that it’s not fair for you all who are reading, because so much happens each day and you deserve to know—and I want you all to be able to know ALL OF IT! But I also want to apologize for not responding to e-mails, letters, and the like. I will do my best to  do that ASAP!

Love you all. At first I thought that no one read this blog, and every time I post I am learning about new followers and individuals who want to hear about how I am doing. That really means a lot to me and I thank God for all of you! Jesus Christ has blessed me with irreplaceable friends.

Thanks for all of the support, love and prayers.

Hopefully I will write sooner than later!